They don't call it the south for Nothing

Kim Kardashian: I'd like to marry this dude and spend $10 million dollars on a publicity wedding please oh and then 72 days later I'd like a divorce

America: Well sure why not?

Britney Spears: I want to get hitched in a chapel in Vegas and have the marriage annulled fifty-five hours later because I didn't know what the hell I was doing

America: Whatever you want!

Carmen Electra: I want to get married in Vegas to this basketball player and then annul the marriage nine days later cuz we were both drunk lololololololololol

America: Okay, sounds like fun!

Gay couple: We would like to get married and spend our lives together and possibly adopt unwanted children to give them a good home and -

America: WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU IDIOTS THAT IS DISGUSTING AND WRONG YOU DEFILE THE SANCTITY OF MARRIAGE SO GTFO